We're at the finish line! Thank you everyone who has read this past month's worth of blogs and told me about it. I've appreciated knowing that I wasn't just talking to myself for the last 30 days.
Dear 20-year-old Pam,
You've spent most of your life being told that you're smart. But here's something you need to know: you really don't know much. Remember that the next time someone tries to give you some advice--it's possible they know what they're talking about and you, smart one, do not. Here are the words of advice I hope you'll accept from me.
1. Keep a low overhead. It will be many years before a famous writer says this to you, and by that time it will be way too late to heed this very sensible advice. So let me just tell you right now: there are many, many things you can do without. (That peach silk dress, for example--don't buy it. You'll never wear it, and you'll feel sick to your stomach every time you see it hanging in your closet.) Keep in mind that money is freedom. The more of it you have, the more control you have over your time.
2. You don't have to be a prodigy. It really doesn't matter how quickly you do things; doing them is the point. Give yourself a break. It takes time to figure out what you're doing, especially with something like writing, which gets better the longer you do it. (And seriously, does anyone even remember those writers who were the prodigies of your generation? Either they're still writing or they're not. No one remembers when they started.)
3. You're fine on your own. Perhaps it's because you grew up with parents who were joined at the hip; I don' know. For some reason, you're pretty much convinced that you can't live a long and happy life without a romantic partner. But here's the thing: you're going to drive across the country to go to graduate school all by yourself. Then you're going to figure out how to do graduate-level research and write award-winning papers and short stories. You will do all of this without a partner. (He'll be along presently. And trust me, he's more than worth the wait.) So believe me when I say that you're fine. In fact, you will come to the conclusion that you're not interested in marriage at all. And this is when you'll meet the guy who will convince you that, actually, you are.
4. Don't be so afraid. People make mistakes, and most of them don't end in disaster. They're not always the result of carelessness. You'll learn, you'll move on--it's part of life. But being afraid of making mistakes will keep you from doing a lot of things, and being afraid to ask questions will also keep you from learning. You're not supposed to know everything. Smart people know enough to recognize what they don't know. In fact, smart people know there's always more to learn.
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